Work-life harmony vs. Balance

Balance. Harmony. What is the difference, and why does it matter?

By textbook definition, balance implies an even distribution of weight enabling someone or something to remain steady and upright. Where harmony, by definition, is the combination of simultaneously sounded musical notes, to complement each other in a chord or progression to create a “pleasing effect.”

I share those definitions because they make it starkly apparent that work-life balance is unrealistic, and a recipe for failure. How realistic is it to think we will distribute our worlds into an even balance between work and life? How productive is it to desire we keep the two separate and distinct? What if the goal was to blend the two – work and life – into a harmony where they ebb and flow as needed, to complement each other?

That approach allows us to acknowledge and incorporate those periods when “life wins.” The time surrounding the bereavement of a loved one, the birth of a baby, the death of a marriage. Conversely, it also makes space for those (hopefully) brief moments when work demands the lion’s share of our attention due to a major deadline, merger, presentation, and product rollout.

It also recognizes that for some people work IS balance. For example, I have a client who manages his anxiety during a major relocation to a new, unfamiliar city, by writing and editing his presentations and proposals for work in the evening. It is familiar, comfortable, and keeps his mind busy while adjusting to his new surroundings. This certainly isn’t his long-term life strategy, but it’s the right answer for him, in this moment.

What would be the shift, the impact, if we reframed the conversation – and possibly the aspiration – to be geared towards harmony instead of balance? That our work and life demands are not, and should not, compete? That they are not in conflict, but in harmony?